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  do as i wish or i will cut you to your very core! In my article about dealing with silent treatments, i used the word he to describe an act that can be started by both men and women. How women hurt themselves by withholding sex feminine power can inspire true masculine love, and no one wants to be cut off from that. The problem with sexual withholding in a marriage has far less to do with actually having or not having sex and much more to do with misunderstanding. If you stop having sex with your spouse, is he or she justified in having an affair? Is the denial of sex just as much as a betrayal as infidelity? While there are all sorts of discussions about marital sex or lack of sex, philosophy professor mark d. White says, we rarely, if ever, talk about the ethics of a spouse refusing to have sex with the other for years. First of all, i realize your post is nearly 3 years old, and i do hope and pray that during that time you and your wife have been able to make some positive changes in your relationship. My wife and i have been married for 21 years, together for 25, wholly without sex for the last 7 years and sexless, as the term is clinically defined, for at least 10likely more, but i cant. But your wife may have stuck around betting that she can wait you out and thinking that eventually you will go back to leaving her alone about all this sex stuff and things can get back to the normal life she has come to love. This is where we begin the final phase of confronting your wifes sexual refusal. His sexual refusal, however, will usually be hidden under the guise of a transparent excuse hes sleepy, sick, preoccupied with work. Withholding sex is one of those behaviors that is passive aggressive. Rather than talk about or say what you are really thinking, you take something away hoping all the while that your partner (man or woman) will figure out your true meaning.   if your spouse doesnt feel like having sex, and you have sex with your spouse any way, im sorry, but that kind of seems pretty textbook rape to me. I dont usually feel like rubbing my wifes feet, yet she plops them into my lap and i rub them anyway. The wife hath not power of her own body, but the husband and likewise also the husband hath not power of his own body, but the wife.

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